January 14, 2010

The Joy of Pain

I had the real pleasure of hearing Jason Cruise, founder of Outdoor Ministry Network and the producer of Me & Dad TV, speak last night at my church.

My biggest takeaway from Jason's speech was the message he relayed about the importance of discipline and the importance of pain being associated with bad decisions.

One of the biggest lessons Jason said he learned from his "daddy" (he's from East Tennessee where dad is better known as daddy, which is pronounced dedee) was that the brain and the hind parts speak the same language. If the butt says "OUCH" the brain says "OUCH".

Jason used Proverbs 13: 24 to make his point about the importance of discipline. The verse reads:

Whoever spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.

This is a hard message to swallow in today's environment. In many ways, we are instructed the only way to parent is with an unwavering love and affection for our child. I would agree with this instruction, but I don't agree with how many people define love and affection.

God tells us through the words of Solomon in Proverbs that if we want to parent with and unwavering love and affection, we will not spare the rod; we will not spare the discipline; we will not hide our children from failure; we will not fail to teach our children that pain follows bad decisions and that there are consequences to every action.

In fact, God tells us that if we do spare the rod and we do fail to properly discipline our children and we do fail to demonstrate the consequences of certain actions, not only do we not love our child, but we actually "hate" our child.

When you unpack this message, it makes perfect sense. If we fail to prepare our child for the harsh realities of life and the pain (both physical and mental) that comes with poor decisions, we are putting them in a path of destruction.

Please don't think I am advocating any kind of abusive behavior. I am simply advocating discipline.

Jason's message was clearly aimed at parenthood, but I think his line of thinking could just as easily be applied to the current financial mess our country is in and the growing dependence the we have on our government.

What our government is essentially trying to do today is to spare the rod. We don't want big companies who made horrible decisions to feel the pain of bankruptcy or total dissolution. We don't want the people who took out loans they couldn't afford to take responsibility for their actions and face foreclosure. We don't want our Nation to face the tough budgetary decisions that are staring us in the face.

Our government tells us they keep borrowing money, increasing taxes, increasing control and regulation, and bailing out failing institutions with billions of borrowed dollars (dollars we will pay back with interest) because they have compassion and care.

President Obama's message has always been that he is bringing us "hope". However, by sparing us the pain and sting of bad decisions and poor judgment, our government is showing that it hates each and every one of us.

Jason wrapped up his tough message with a very soft and powerful ending. He said the best thing his father ever did for him had nothing to do with the shelter he provided him with our the gifts he gave him or the number of his baseball games he attended. The best thing his father ever did for him was tell him he loved him and was proud of him each and every day of his life.

We are called not to spare the rod, but we are also called not to spare our enduring and everlasting love for our children.

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